Reflections on the Year at PC

I finally feel like I am getting my feet back under me after making the move back to Minnesota.  I wanted to put some thoughts down about the past 11 months because I am so quick to forget.  When I am quick to forget, it makes me quick to complain.  So much happened in our lives and hearts and it is hard to condense it into a few short points, but here are a few ways God was sanctifying me and shaping me...

1.       The biggest overall theme of this year was God is faithful.  It is still mind boggling to me that a church of our size was able to support us for the whole year.  In March of 2011, there was $1200 in the mission account and in our finite minds, raising $60000 looked impossible.  But by June, we had pledges from people in our church, family and friends to fully fund the year!  He continued to be faithful at every turn.

2.       He was kind in His specific care for us.  I think everyone in the PC had examples of specific care for them.  He is a big God, but He is also very personal and knows how to care specifically for all of us.  A couple examples in our life was how He provided piano and violin teachers at affordable costs and put us in a neighborhood that had another homeschooling family with girls the same age as ours.

3.       This was a time for me in growing in thankfulness and being content in where God has me in this moment.  This of course is a work in progress, but I am quicker to start thanking God when my heart begins to grumble.

4.       I got caught in the snare to compare.  Every one of the wives are godly women and it was easy to see how so many of them would make great pastor's wives.  I found myself getting jealous and angry.  Then it dawned on me to start thanking God for the unique gifts He gave these women and wow, when I went from grumbling to thanking, it totally changed my view and attitude.

5.       This year was very difficult in regard to the hives I have been suffering from for the past 2 and half years.  For some reason, they became worse out east and it was difficult to get them under control.  I was on steroids for relief over 40 times and this was only when they were on my face or were so bad I couldn't take it anymore.  I have grumbled a lot and pleaded for them to be healed.  I am still asking for healing, but I am also, through the help of the Holy Spirit, trying to trust the Lord that there is some purpose in this suffering.  I have no idea what it is yet, but I do know that God uses all things for our good and His glory.  And I hope I am quicker to return to that truth than I was a year ago.

6.       I need to adopt more of an upward and outward focus.  It is so easy to fall into a pity party for myself...there is never enough time, I have too much to do, Ken gets to do all the "fun stuff" (as if work is all fun for him) while all I do is take care of kids and home, I just need some time to myself, and on and on it goes.  When I reorient my heart towards the One who ordains my steps and look at serving others as my offering to the Lord, again, it changes everything.  I hope I am growing in this too.

7.       Finally, during this year, God has been gently showing me that I need to take more initiative in pursuing relationships instead of just waiting for things to happen or for people to come to me.  This is a challenge as my tendency is to retreat into myself, but by God's grace, He is giving me the ability to take steps in this.

What a gift this past year has been!

Happy Birthday to Me

I turned 40 last week.  There.  I said it. Actually, I had no trouble with turning 40, although just saying that number makes me sound older.  

I had a GREAT birthday.  My family flew in and surprised me. I couldn't believe it.  Part actually got spilled on FB when someone mentioned that my sister was coming out here. She is a bit spontaneous and free spirited, so it didn't completely surprise me that she would come.  So when she showed up on my doorstep, I was't exactly surprised, but I was so happy to have her here with me.  She came in and we sat in the living room to chat.  15 minutes or so rolled around and I heard footsteps outside.  I look out there and the rest of my family was out there with birthday signs.  I think I said this already, but I couldn't believe it.  I felt so humbled and loved that they would spend that much money to come spend a couple days with us.  And I count it as God's kindness.  If there was one thing I could have picked for my birthday, it would have been to celebrate it with my family.  It will definitely be a birthday I will remember and treasure.

I love them.  :-)

Too Cute Not to Post...

Tonight during tuck in time, Zoe laid in bed with the "big girls."  Normally, I will put her down and then tuck them in.  By the expression on her face, you could tell she was enjoying every single second of laying in the big girl bed with them.  Then, while we were praying, I had to go grab my camera.  I was so excited to capture the moment!

Isn't that adorable?!  I love that she is learning to love the Lord early.

31 Ways to Pray for Your Children

I thought this was excellent and I hope to start using this to help me as I pray for my children:

http://www.d6curriculum.com/teacher/previous-quarter/fusion-31-ways-to-pray

To God be all glory...

Zoe Update

Since this was originally a blog about our journey with bringing Zoe into our family, I think it is time to give an update on Zoe. Zoe means life and she fits her name well. She is full of life. She definitely colors our life way more than it would be without her. Her favorite things are eating, playing with her sisters, reading books and laying on our dog Piper. Thankfully, Piper is a very patient dog. She seems advanced for where I think she should be, but maybe I am biased. She seems to understand a lot, she "talks" a lot, and every once in a while a sentence will come out of her mouth. When she was 12 months old, she was standing by the step down into our living room. She held out her hand to me and said, "I need help." I really couldn't believe my ears. That seemed so young. But then later that day I was holding her and I had on a necklace that has a picture of Hope and Gracie on it. Zoe was looking at the necklace and said "I see Gracie." Again I couldn't believe it. I didn't think a 12 months old baby could say anything more than maybe one or two words like mama or dada. I have come to the conclusion that she is really saying stuff with her babbling and we just can't understand it. But once in a while it comes out clearly. Today she said (she is almost 16 mo. old now) "I need to get that" about something she was pointing to on the floor.

She continues to be a big girl and weighs 27 pounds, but the chunkiness fits her personality. Below are some recent pictures of Zoe who brings so much joy to our lives...

Falling asleep at lunch as she transitions from 2 naps to 1

Zoe wanting to try on her sister's glasses

Zoe at the Smithsonian National Art Gallery

This is such a Zoe look

Zoe with her two sister and wanting to be part of the action

Fun School Day with the Girls

I usually hit the wall with homeschooling around February. At least that has happened every year for the past 4 years. I haven't quite hit that point yet, but I am heading that direction. And as the leader goes, so goes the students. So we switched it up yesterday and threw out all the traditional school and did some fun stuff. We have been studying the digestive and renal systems in anatomy, so we decided to make a digestive system amusement park. This turned out to be one of the highlights of the year and also turned out way cooler than I thought it would. We started with listing some parts of the digestion system and some rides we wanted in our park. Then we brainstormed to come up with names and a map of our park. Then we started creating. The girls had a ball and so did I. Here are some pics of our results...









My personal favorites were the kidney flowers and the saliva pool. At lunch time, we mixed it up again as I said, "Let's go to Pizza Hut!" At that point the girls wanted to know where their mother went and if I was their real mother. Ha ha. When we finished, they gave daddy a grand tour of the park and were able to tell him what each part of the digestive system did. They said we didn't have school today, but I was thinking "oh yes you did and you probably learned way more than if we had done what we normally do." I am glad I was that "other mom" today and hopefully it won't be too long before she throws another day out the window.

My New Journal!

I am really excited about this new journal I have. Thank you Julie Pursewell for the inspiration. I am the first to admit that I am not creative, but I will steal someone’s great idea when I see one (with due credit, of course). I had been struggling with a way to keep track of the different types of notes I like to keep: verses that speak to me, prayer requests, praises, sermon notes, notes from books I have been reading, etc. I have tried various things and what I ended up with were notes scattered all over the place. When I wanted to find something, I often could find lots of other notes, just not the ones I needed! Not any more though. I laugh at myself that I couldn’t come up with this because now it seems so simple. I could create one. So off to Office Depot I went after our PC wives meeting with Betsy and Julie. I purchased a small binder, some loose paper, small pocket folders to act as dividers and in a very short time, I had my new all-in-one journal. I am so excited. So here is the result:

The Word of God is Active...

We are getting to the point with our older girls of transitioning more to discipling them more than disciplining them. This has been difficult to navigate through because we are still learning what this will look like. But this week I felt in a very tangible way the truth of Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and spirit,...”

Hope has always been a very strong–willed child and when disciplining her, and it often takes a lot for her will to submit to our authority. This can often be a drawn out process. This past week, I was faced with another challenge in her disobedience and attitude. She was sent to her room until I was able to talk to her. This was mostly so she could think about things and also for me to pray and think through how I was going to approach her. After a while, I went up to her room and started with why I sent her to her room. Her response was she didn’t mind being in her room. So I told her that if that if being in her room didn’t help her think, she would need to be made a little more uncomfortable.

So I sent her to stand in the corner so she could think about things. Again, I needed to think and pray how to approach her (and work through my anger at this point too.) I then sent her back to her room so we could talk. She was still pretty cavalier and her attitude was not sweet. I didn’t know exactly what I was going to say, but I did grab my Bible and brought it in with me.

When I opened my Bible, I saw this:

The Three Trees-It has been a great tool used by our church and many SG churches to make gospel connections with our behaviors and the roots of those behaviors in our hearts. But it doesn’t leave it at that. It takes us to the cross and what Christ did for our sins on that tree. I thought that would be a good thing to help me talk through things with Hope. And as I did, something amazing happened. She started sobbing as we talked through the three trees and what Christ did for us. Her will was submitting to the Lord and her attitude was changed.This had a profound impact on me. Spending 5 minutes helping Hope apply the gospel to her life did more to change her behavior than the half hour she spent having consequences for her actions. I saw the word of God cutting her to her heart and that verse in Hebrews came alive in that instant. The word of God is powerful to change our lives, but also powerful to change the lives of our children. We labor in sewing into their lives at these young ages often without seeing much reaping. But when we do catch a glimpse of the reaping, it is sweetness to the soul.

P.S. Excuse the crazy font stuff going on. Not sure why it was doing this.

Gratefulness

The key to being grateful is often just a shift in our perspective. Oh how I need to remember this.

Long overdue...again

How does time slip away so quickly?

We have had a full several weeks since last posting. My family minus my brother visited for 6 days. We enjoyed lots of time together, went into D.C twice as well as the Great Falls of the Potomac River on the Maryland side. While in D.C we visited The Spy Museum, Air and Space Museum, and took a White House Tour. We didn't see the Obama's, but we did see their dog, Bo.

Two weeks after they left, our pastor's from Minnesota along with their wives were here for the pastor's conference. Pastor Scott and Angela stayed with us and we were able to enjoy some time with them. Angela and I went to D.C. to see the American History Museum. It was a perfect day for walking outside and enjoying Starbucks coffee and a few laughs. The pastor's conference was great and we heard some good messages. We have been incredibly blessed with a care group that has "adopted" us for the time we are out here and they provided babysitting so we could attend the 3 day conference.

A week after they left, our good friend Becky came to visit for 9 days and what a blessing that was! The girls, of course, got out of most of their school so we could enjoy time with her. We added more field trips to our growing list including a tavern in a house from the 1700's which also had a hidden room that was part of the underground railroad (very cool!), a Civil War wax museum, D.C. National Zoo, Union Station, and the Postal Museum. We enjoyed a quiet Thanksgiving here at home with her. Becky and I squeezed in a couple movies and went Black Friday shopping. That was a crazy night which involved observing a couple fights at Walmart and some lady having to go the hospital after being knocked unconscious.

Three weeks after that which is now only a week away, we are flying to Minnesota for Christmas break. Whew. Between all that, we are trying hard to keep up with school, maintain the household, and make time for fellowship and community with friends. Ken is doing great in school, managing his time well, and balancing family and school in a worthy manner.

In the midst of all our busyness, the one constant is God's faithfulness. He is faithful to His word, His promises, His kindess, and His unconditional love.

Below are some pics of the past couple months.

Thank you to all who continue to pray for us. It is felt and appreciated!

Hopefully, we will see some of you soon!

Where to begin?

A beautiful day at Brookside Gardens

No explanation needed. :-)

Finally a few sunny days to enjoy.
We have had so much rain lately!

We have already been her close to 2 months and if the rest of the year continues to go this fast, well, it is going to be over before we know it.

Last week was very busy, but like always, God's grace was sufficient. Ken and all the other men in the pastor's college spent the week in Philadelphia learning under Dave Harvey and some of the other pastor's there.

While he was gone, these were some of the highlights from on the homefront:

-Zoe turned 1! It is hard to believe it, but it is true. What a joy she is. Ken of course wasn't here, but he did get to wish her happy birthday on Skype.

-Camel crickets! Yuck! I hired the girls to catch them for me in the basement: 50 cents for the biggies, and 25 cents for the babies. We didn't know what they were. What we did know was that they looked like a cross between a spider and a cricket, they can really hop, and they hop towards you. So this led us to some detective work. We packed one of these bugs in tupperware and ended in a trip to...

-Brookside Botanical Gardens. The place was beautiful and some very helpful volunteers solved our mystery bug question.

-A visit from two officers from the police department to our home. A series of freaky coincidences resulted in calling in a report to the police and having them come check things out. All turned out fine and we were amazed and humbled by the outpouring of care to bring us comfort: multiple offers to stay elsewhere until Ken got home, neighbors checking things out for us, and much prayer.

-Ken came home. We all missed him and were really glad when he got back. He actually took a whole day off of his studies, a first since starting school.

I was reminded this week once again of our dependence on and need for God. He is the one who sustains us and keeps us. To Him be all the glory and honor and praise.

Legan Happenings...

We have been busy these days, but God has been faithful and He is always good!

Here are some of our highlights...

We finished our third week of schooling and I would describe it (so far!) as a sweet time with my girls. I don't know if it is that they are getting older or we are out of our normal context, but it truly has been enjoyable! Hope's favorite subject so far is cursive and is taking great joy in writing Scriptures and sending them to people. Gracie's favorite is music which is no surprise there!

-God provided a way for the girls to continue with violin and piano while here. Their teachers are teenagers who have been playing since they were little and that gives us a price that fits our budget. H & G think it is cool that they are teenagers and it has given them a vision to maybe do this when they are older.

-Several fieldtrips! We want to make fieldtrips a priority and take advantage of the history available to us out here. We have been to Gettysburg and learned about the Civil War. We have visited Jametown-the first permanent English settlement (even before the Pilgrims), Yorktown-the final Battlefield of the War for Independence, and Williamsburg-the former capital of Virginia which is now a living history museum for how they lived during colonial times (1700's). Next up is the National Zoo in Washington D.C.

-Ken is settling into PC and getting a rhythm for balancing school and family.

-Zoe popped another tooth and now has 9! She has a mouthful. She is running around everywhere is a joy to us all.

-Hope turned 9 yesterday. Birthday are SO important to Hope and she plans them months in advance-all the details to her cake, the theme, invitations, games, etc. With her take charge skills, I am pretty sure she could run a small country. :-) This year she opted for a fancy dinner out with the family. Yay, cheaper than a kids party and less planning! So we found a sitter for Zoe, got dressed up in our fancy dresses and daddy with his tie and shirt, and away we went. She was so excited and told us that it was the best best birthday ever.

Thank you so much for continuing to pray for us while we are out here. It is deeply appreciated.

First Day of School....

for Ken that is!

It has been a loooong time since Ken has been is this position and I think it will a challenging but very good 10 months for him. Not to mention a life changing 10 months. The girls and I dropped Ken off and went in to get a couple pictures on the first day of school. Many of the other men in his class were arriving at the same time and there was much anticipation and excitement in the air. We are looking forward to seeing God's mighty work in the minds and hearts of these men and their families.

Happenings in Maryland...

Playroom downstairs.

Zoe's room and she is finally in a crib!

Hope's half of the room-with her very own bed.

Gracie's side of the room-with her own bed too!

An unpacked kitchen-thanks Becky M!

So lots has been going on and I think that this is just the beginning of a very busy next 10 months....

After having an earthquake last Tuesday, the rest of the week was filled with reports of Hurricane Irene coming. We even had an automated message from the electric company telling us to prepare for power outages for 2-3 days. So just to be cautious, we did buy some bottled water and candles and tied down some loose things outside. Well, we got our hurricane last night which amounted to some moderate winds and moderate rain. We did spend about an hour cleaning up leaves and branches, but it was mostly anticlimatic here, anyways.

We did get out this week for our first official fieldtrip. We spent a few hours at the Gettysburg battlefields and museums. We all learned a lot and hopefully there will be many more learning fieldtrips this year.

We had some kickoff events for our PC year and I don't think I can describe how cared for we are feeling out here. They have gone way beyond the extra mile. Here is just one of many examples already. We had our orientation yesterday. When we pulled up to the church, they had people waiting to valet park our cars. When we picked them up, every car had been detailed inside and out!

Other events this week included orientation to our new homeschool co-op, a PC ladies luncheon, Hope's handbell choir concert, and introduction of the new PC class to the church.

I posted a couple pictures of our house, in case anyone was interested in seeing where we are living...

We had an earthquake today!

I can chalk this up as an experience we will probably never have in Minnesota. We were all spaced out in the house. Ken was in the basement, Hope was upstairs reading, and Gracie and I were at the table doing math. All of a sudden, the whole house started shaking. The dining room light started swinging and Gracie and I watched a pencil roll across the table. Hope came running downstairs and said a shirt fell off the hanger. Ken just ran up the stairs. The whole thing lasted maybe 20 seconds and we were left wondering what in the world just happened. I wondered out loud if that could have been an earthquake, but seemed unlikely in Maryland. After getting on the internet, we found out it was an earthquake that registered 5.8! Let the adventure begin!

We are settled into our house with much thanks to Becky M. She was able to come out here for a time and is a master organizer. I know I would still have many boxes left to unpack if it were not for her. She was truly a blessing. We are staying in a cute townhouse about a mile from the pastor's college. Everyone we have met seems really nice and the neighborhood is quiet. The girls have met several friends and two of them are their ages a couple houses from us and they school at home as well. God is faithful in even the details!

The hives I have been battling for the past (almost) 2 years have been back with a vengeance since moving out here. I am not sure if it is the stress or something different about the environment or what, but they have been out of control. I have been miserable and nothing seems to help. Yesterday, my eyes were swollen shut. They sap my energy and I feel guilty because I am not functioning well and cannot care well for my family. When they are on my face, I look horrible and feel horrible. I am so incredibly frustrated with them because I feel helpless to do anything about it and my life is planned around the hives. I would appreciate prayers for healing or something that would help and in the meantime grace to endure well this "thorn in my side".

Thankful for you all,
Becky

T-29 days!

Yikes! The time is passing fast and we are down to the trying to see everyone one last time phase. Oh yeah, and packing everything up phase. I get a little overwhelmed when I think of everything that needs to get done in the next few weeks, but in the end, it always gets done. As of last night, we have a home and God was very kind. We had a different townhome last week, but it fell through. Now the one we are going to be living in is bigger, newer, closer to the church and for the same price as the other home. The next big thing on the to do list is find some reasonable insurance. We have a couple good leads that look promising. In the midst of feeling overwhelmed, I am thankful for the fact that God is faithful and He will continue to be faithful.

grace, like manna

So those who followed our snowflake story may have noticed that I changed the name of the blog to grace, like manna. I am not sure if I heard that somewhere or it just came to me, but whatever the case, I thought it was a fitting name. Manna was the food miraculously provided to the Israelites by God for 40 years in the dessert. It fell every night and they were to gather only as much as they needed for that day, except for a double portion the day before Sabbath. If they kept some for later use, it putrefied and bred worms. This "bread from heaven" was the main nutritional component in sustaining them for the many years they spent in the dessert. Being on this side of the cross, we can also see this as a foreshadowing of Jesus being the bread of life, our sustainer. In fact, He called Himself that. I see several parallels between His grace and the manna He provided thousands of years ago. God was faithful then, and because of His unchanging character, He is faithful still. Manna was sufficient for their needs just as His grace is always sufficient. Manna couldn't be stockpiled for later, nor can His grace. He provides us with the grace we need when we need it. I think we all can look back at different circumstances in our lives and see very clearly his sufficient grace. So as we continue on this journey which as of right now has many unknowns, I will remind myself of how He faithfully cared for the Israelites and how we will continually care and provide for us.

Transitioning of My Blog

Transitioning this blog into one about our family and how God is working in our lives has been on my mind for a while, but since writing is not something I particularly enjoy, it has mostly just stayed in my mind. However, to truly remember what God has done, how He orchestrates things together in ways we could never have seen, to not forget His faithfulness, and to keep a grateful heart, it is important to write things down. (at least for me)

But it wouldn't be right without first giving an update about Zoe, our snowflake baby. This blog started out with our journey through embryo adoption and the end result was Zoe! It is fun and amazing to look back through my entries and see all the twists and turns this story took, and how it all came together according to God's sovereign plan. It still is surreal to look at her and think about how she was frozen as an embryo baby over 10 years ago, how I was able to carry her even though she shares none of our genetics, and that technically there are 3 other fully genetic siblings somewhere in this world that were conceived at the same time, yet are different ages than her. It's crazy. I remember thinking when I first learned what a snowflake baby was, "Is anything too wonderful for God"? I wonder if that is even close to how Mary felt when she was told by the angel that she would be the mother of the coming Messiah.

Can I just tell you what an absolute joy Zoe is?! She is almost 8 months old and is a very happy baby. She sleeps about 12 hours per night and usually takes a 3 hour nap in the morning. She smiles all the time and loves to move, move, move! I will not be surprised if she skips the crawling stage and goes right to walking in the next month or two. She has cut 4 teeth and has figured out how to give those big sloppy open mouthed kisses. She says mama and dada and even signed the word for more a couple times when she was eating those puffs that easily dissolve and taste like flavored air. Zoe is very curious and also determined. She is also quite the comedienne. I love her fat cheeks, her little tongue that always seems to hang out, her mohawk, everything about her. Take a look at some of the recent pics of her....

Evolution of a Zo-hawk...

Zoe was born with a natural mohawk which I learned from my two nephews was actually a fauxhawk. It has come to be one of her trademarks and fits so well with her personality. So many people have stopped us and commented on her hair. Her hair doesn't lay down and the one time I tried to put it down, it ended up being a lopsided fauxhawk. Over the last four months, it has gone through several phases. It has transitioned from being almost black when she was born to ever lightening shades of blond. It started out at perhaps an inch long and has grown so much that I actually had to trim it down. It has certainly thinned out and is becoming quite wispy. One day at church, Ken's friend dubbed her fauxhawk a Zo-hawk and I think the name is going to stick.

I love this little girl that God has given us and I am amazed at His grace displayed in this kind gift. I am thankful that I get a front row seat in watching Zoe's life unfold, Zo-hawk and all.

1 week old

1 month old

1.5 months old

2 months old


2.5 months old

4 months old

A Christmas Tradition

Ken started a tradition almost 20 years ago when we first started dating: he buys me an ornament every year for Christmas. When we started having children, he added them to his Christmas tradition and by the time they move out of the house, they will have a nice start to their own tree and with it lots of memories. He puts a lot of thought into it and picks an ornament that fits our personality or interests at the time or something relating to what is going on in our lives. So decorating the tree starts with opening the new ornament and putting it on the tree. There is great excitement when the girls open their boxes of ornaments from years past and remember what he gave them and why they received those particular ones. For those who know Gracie, you will not be surprised that she has several Elmo ones nor for Hope that she has various princess ones. And for me, it is perfectly fitting that I have some pertaining to chocolate! Ha ha.

So this is Zoe's first year of getting her ornament and it was pretty much a no-brainer of what she would be getting: a snowflake, of course! We are still in awe of our little snowflake and so humbled by God's kindness He lavished on us in making her a part of our family.

As you celebrate your own Christmas traditions, remember the reason we have Christmas: to celebrate the birth of our Savior. Our Savior, the One who came to this earth and lived a perfect life. Our Savior, the One who fulfilled every aspect of the Law. Our Savior, the One who was tempted in every way but remained sinless. Our Savior, the One who died on the cross as the payment for our sins. Our Savior, the One who rose again. And our Savior, the One who now sits at the right hand of the Father and intercedes on our behalf.

Merry Christmas!